Concentrate

Concentrate was a project I started during the Innovate module of the BA Photography degree I am doing with Falmouth University. The module allowed students to pick their own topic, which gave me the freedom to explore what it is like being autistic. My idea was to create a series of images that captured the feelings, habits, and traits that are typical associated with autism. The series allows a glimpse into things like social issues, meltdowns, anxiety, stimming, sensory overload, and suicidal thoughts. My main goal with the project was to help increase more awareness about what it is like being autistic, and also as a cathartic process for myself. I think becoming more self-aware and accepting of part of who I am is very important, especially as I have no formal autism diagnosis.

I chose to use Polaroid because I personally find myself looking at film/Polaroid and those images look 'real' to me. It is hard to fully explain, but to me, digital images look flat. I believe this is due to film having more dynamic range, noise, and having an overall rougher textured look. I also wanted a more tactile media, which would allow people to pick up and look closer at those photos. The archival images of my school reports as a child are a glimpse into my school life. Words like needs to concentrate were common, yet my grades were high. I believe the problem was that I was concentrating too much and the work wasn't challenging.